This was a piece of advice I gave one of my friends just when he was about to get married.
This is just a starting point to understanding a marriage. Marriage is not just about being with your better-half and understanding him/her, and living with him/her. In India, it is more about settling in the family than with the hubby. There are just too many complexities there. If these hadn't been there, life would have been much simpler. So, for a successful marriage, aim for a successful bonding with the family. It's extremely important and difficult a job for the girl. And, whether alone or with her husband's help, she must strive for it. It not only defines the success of her marriage, it defines her happiness, her husband's happiness and the general good-health of the family. The happiness of a woman is generally ignored in Indian marriages but it is the most crucial.
A girl’s happiness and adjustment in the family totally depends
on the boy and never the girl. So, it will always be your work to fix up
things. Once you believe in this, you’ll never face any family problems. She’ll
give you all the happiness in life but you’ll be happier if she’s herself happy
from within. And that onus depends on you.
I learnt it by seeing Tarun. He’s done that and I’ve seen a girl
(myself) change from a rebel to a complete Indian bahu taking care of the
family, keeping everyone together, respecting everyone etc etc.. keeping the
whole family happy. I never expected all of this from myself. There are so many
things I never believed in or my parents still don’t believe in. But, he’s made
me understand and see the beauty behind it. So, all the points go to Tarun for
making it possible. The patience, perseverance and belief in himself and love
for me made it possible.This is just a starting point to understanding a marriage. Marriage is not just about being with your better-half and understanding him/her, and living with him/her. In India, it is more about settling in the family than with the hubby. There are just too many complexities there. If these hadn't been there, life would have been much simpler. So, for a successful marriage, aim for a successful bonding with the family. It's extremely important and difficult a job for the girl. And, whether alone or with her husband's help, she must strive for it. It not only defines the success of her marriage, it defines her happiness, her husband's happiness and the general good-health of the family. The happiness of a woman is generally ignored in Indian marriages but it is the most crucial.
It shows how much you respect your Tarun, Madame:)
ReplyDeleteAnd while everyone says it's the duty of the girl to keep the family together, you have proof that the girl needs back up more.
Thank you for the gyaan, I'm already plotting ways to woo my in-laws to be:D
@PV: :) Well, I can only say that he's truly earned it. I'm the today's modern girl who doesn't love/hate/respect/etc without reason. If I do then the person must have worked hard for it. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd, while you're getting ready with your arsenal for pleasing ur in-laws, do not forget the most important one, to be ready for anything and everything. No one else can understand/solve your problems coz no one else has been in them the way u r. So, you 'have' to create ur own rules, ur own solutions, ur own story
All the best!! :)